A Night at the Circus with Darren Shan

In which I meet the author Darren Shan in a dream (a short challenge piece)

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He sat down beside me just as the featured act took their place upon the stage. I had a vague recollection of the performers that came prior; the snake boy, the bearded lady, the man so very, very tall. I wonder briefly if the things I thought I saw might have been a lingering remnant of my subconscious. Yet, despite the haziness, the image of the older man beside me scarfing down a jelly spider felt more vivid than I was used to.

His eyes seemed intent at that moment on looking over the ginger haired figure upon the stage, sporting his own flesh and blood spider. He radiated an aura of ease within the confines of the circus tent. No gazing in awe at the colourful surroundings. No gawping at the supposed freaks inhabiting the place. Just the nonchalant munching of sweets.  Dwelling longer on it, I can understand why. After all, he’s the man who created this world. He already knows what it all looks like and has the capacity to change all of in within the blink of an eye.

Not like he would. At least, I assume that. My admiration for the Cirque du Freak paints my vision of it as perfect.

I want to ask him a million questions.

How did he envision such a strange place?

Why did Kurda do what he did?

Did Steve really hate Darren in the end?

Who exactly was Mr Tiny?

As though he can sense my curiosity, Shan slurps up the last leg of his spider.

“I like your passion” he responds, never removing his eyes from the performance. The ginger haired man, whom I recognise as the infamous vampiric mentor, is playing a soulful though melancholy tune to which the real spider dances its way over his arms. Shan watches him with the expression of one that might reflect his namesake character; respect and grievance. I can understand that. I followed him on the same journey after all. Although I’m mildly intimidated by his presence, I try to whisper words of comfort.

“It must be great, right? Seeing him alive and happy again, like it never happened”

He shakes his head.

“No…if anything it’s harder” Shan manages to croak out. I cock my head and furrow my brow.

“Why? I’d have thought you’d be delighted to see your own creations living, breathing and performing again” I reply, voicing my confusion in an attempt to keep this dream a positive one. The moment he turns his dark eyes to connect with mine, I’m awash with a nostalgic sadness. Through the couple of blurred tears I can’t seem to hold back, I take the opportunity to get a proper look at my childhood hero. The greying hairs and weathered skin bring to mind a man who has seen war. Not unlike his namesake character.

“I know it shouldn’t be like this” he states. “This might be how we want it to be, but we both know it shouldn’t and can’t stay like this”

With that he looks at the ginger vampire below, who is licking up the wires of the spider web entwined around his open mouth. His classic act. I feel something squish in my palm. Squinting in the dim light downwards, I find my own jelly spider resting in my palm. I feel a sense of reluctance to eat such a rare find.

But then I remember what Shan said.

And I take a bite.