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Showing posts from June, 2019

Defeat

I lie, outstretched, on the bare bones mattress. With my life in bags, I accept my defeat against time itself. This place isn't mine; Not forever. So wait for me I'll be back; Looking at you from the other side of the hourglass.

Ready or Not

Stacking boxes, locking the door, I say goodbye to the child that still isn't ready to grow up. Look at me kid. Papers are due, and so is the rent. We can't keep living in a dream if we want to stay in this imperfect heaven. I'm sorry to say, in order to gain we have to endure the growing pains. So stop hurting me, because nothing will change. Yes, I had to trash that silly story from year ten. Don't cry. We've made better things since then. You can scream all you like, but I can't control the clock. I'm not god. We're both more human Than we thought. I promise, I'll make it work. We can survive on our own. Live normally, like Deku without his quirk. Look I'm tired. You're tired. We've always been tired. So let's stop fighting, before we break ourselves. I'm kissing him goodbye now. I'm handing the last bag to mum. Time to go. You coming? ... Please? ... Don...

Tired

The clock ticks over to 4:33; I've stayed up a little too late again. I rub my eyes and close the half finished job application open on my phone. That, and the twenty other random tabs. Pictures, queries and porn. Each one marks minutes of another sleepless night. Even after clearing the cache, the thoughts don't disappear. The insistence that sleep is unnecessary leads me to open Facebook for the hundredth time that past day. Not much has changed, as expected. The same few posts with a couple of extra comments. Companies upload their scheduled ads. No one has touched that creative piece I posted. Not mine at least. The other one I shared got rave reviews. I hope the artist is happy. I hope they're proud. I'm not bitter. Okay, I'm bitter. But I'm honest. I am proud of them. Like I'm proud of my friends. I scroll back through one more time and play out their posts vicariously. Job interviews, degrees, houses, achievements, fame, glory, happiness, lov...